fortis

my head hurts so much I can barely function. 

how the fuck did i get blisters on the bottom of my feet

tbh I don’t really give a fuck how many blogs I follow. If I like it i’ll follow it, regardless of how many I’m already following. idk I just don’t think it’s fair to not follow someone because you’re following too many people. like op I have too many friends, let me just excommunicate myself from one of them to fit another one in.

no.

guys what would you classify my blog as? idk

………on my calendar.

Sometimes I sit silently in class. All of these people around me are talking, all of my friends are some where else. I’m not excluded, but I am not included either. I don’t feel like talking. I watch everyone and hear their conversations, and I think about how they used to be. A year ago, a week ago. I am overwhelmed by the sense that everyone is changing and I am underwhelmed by the knowledge that I am not. Not at the same pace, or in the same ways. It puts me outside of them, I don’t belong in the same way’s that they do. This is comforting, because when I look at them, I don’t like what I see.

I have an understanding that they don’t. That changing constantly, trying to develop yourself without any experience or knowledge. That changing constantly doesn’t build onto what you have, but it makes you things you once were not, and leaves other things behind. It makes it hard to connect to the same people over periods of time. Your personality is like a backpack, it can only hold so many things no matter how hard you try, and it will get heavy to carry around, hard to find things if you keep too much. Do not change often, but when it is necessary.